Journal 8 – Do you remember?

We used to laugh more, we used to playfully roll around in the covers on our days off together. We would spend the entire day naked; touching, kissing, loving one another with our eyes. We would make love and take breaks all day, cook dinner together, throw on sweats and run to walmart for ice cream together. We would talk, watch movies and cuddle. 

Do you remember?

It’s difficult to do this with children. Even though you finally have Sundays off again… i can’t walk around naked because our 19month old is far too curious of my multiple piercings, you can’t because he’s far too interested in your cock, and it’s just… Awkward now.

i’ve been craving this for a very long time now. And it just doesn’t seem to be in the cards right now. i miss you. We sleep in the same bed every night. We stay up late every night to spend time with one another… But i miss you.

i miss you as you lay sleeping next to me, as you sit in your chair above me, i miss you as you stroke my hair and tell me good girl. 

i miss you because i know we cannot be like we were before. i miss you because we have both changed so much. i miss you because i know this change is forever, with minor future escapes i can only hope for and dream of.

i love you. As my Master, as my Husband, as my Friend, as my Lover, as my equal, as the Father of our son. You are part of my soul, it wouldn’t breath without you, i know because i suffocated without you.


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